A Path for Some

The subject waited patiently in the hallway. He was waiting his turn just like everyone else. Finally he was close enough to see people ducking through the round opening up ahead. Still though, he was quite a distance from the door’s welcoming presence. Even while he stood there, watching so many achieve what they had sought, a doubt worked its way around his mind. He wondered “Maybe the line, which up until this point moved along with few hiccups, would suddenly come to a stop.” Yet while this was a concern to the subject, it was hardly the most dreaded outcome. He dare not speak that out loud though! That was a thought that was far too awful to bring to life. He pushed the thought forcibly aside. He took another few steps closer to the door. Now he could smell a scent wafting from the opening. Oh, such a heavenly smell; it blended perfectly with the music that drifted out alongside it. Nothing but pure desire overtook the subject. He wanted to be past all of this solemn line walking! He needed to be in there. Again the doubt worked its way around his mind like a brain-eating worm. Why was this taking so long! People were waiting for him in there. Maybe the others wouldn’t mind if he edged past them. Even while mulling this thought over in his mind, he knew it wouldn’t work. He was well versed in the rules of the corridor. “Everyone must wait their turn to enter.” He must have repeated this to himself ten thousand times while waiting in this cursed line! Everyone moved forward a couple more steps. The subject watched as one by one those in the line were escorted through the doorway. Even as he edged his way closer to the door, a throbbing dread started to ripple through his body. It started in his face and worked its way down to his stomach. All of a sudden he was very hot and clammy. He wondered if someone turned off the air conditioning in the hallway. Beads of sweat beaded out from the pores of his rapidly reddening forehead. “But the line is still moving.” “Why am I feeling this way?” Now just a few people stood between him and his future. Just a few more minutes. He was so close to utter joy he couldn’t contain his excitement. As he stepped up to the doorposts he banished all thoughts of timidity from his mind. This was his time! He had waited in line for all this time. Of course, he would be let in. He had momentary glimpses beyond the curtain strung across the opening. It was magnificent! He put in the work and now HERE GOES! Even as the exhilaration propelled his foot across the threshold of the door he knew. All at once every one of those dark thoughts, he had so vigorously stifled, suddenly jumped up punching him in the stomach. “NO! This cannot be happening to me. I was the ordinary one, the guy that didn’t stand out. Things just work themselves out.” A hand clasped around his shoulder. “Sir, I’m going to need you to step out of this line.” Faint and out of breath he staggered out of the line even as the person behind stepped through the doorway. The subject was beside himself with all manner of emotions. He contemplated dashing for the door. Of course, that wouldn’t work though. A hollow emptiness filled his once hopeful spirit. Sometimes waves of grief leave no place of solace. Only darkness has its arms open while all others have left him behind. “How was I ever so naïve to think I could get in?” “While I never stood out from the crowd, I never stood out either.” “I used the shadows to sneak by undetected by the world. But that was never the way to get through the door.” Dejected and without hope the subject walked slowly away. He was never seen again.